Divorce mediation can work in almost every divorce. Here are a few tips to make your mediation effective and successful and your experience as smooth as possible.
- Choose a mediator with experience in divorce AND finances.
- Have mediation take place on neutral ground.
- Understand what the mediator does and does not have the power to decide.
- Be willing to listen; the purpose of mediation is to facilitate discussion between the two parties.
- Stop thinking of your ex as the enemy, and start thinking of them as someone you have to work with in the long term.
- Feel stuck and uneasy to talk about your goals and needs in front of your ex? Don’t sweat it. Ask to speak privately with the mediator and it’s up to him/her to present the information in a constructive, helpful way.
- Come prepared with financial information.
- Give up the idea of “fair” and instead work toward “equitable.”
- Set reasonable time limits.
- Although Colorado doesn’t require you to hire a lawyer to get divorce; you can always have your mediated agreements reviewed by one.
You can find detailed information on property division and divorce finances in my book The Bedroom Elephant: A Guide to Successful Divorce at http://www.amazon.com/The-Bedroom-Elephant-Successful-Divorce-ebook/dp/B00H4E61BM